The Answers Are Within.

Stephen covey, in the seven habits of highly effective people, shares an experience that he once had while travelling on the new york sub way.

Imagine you are riding the subway early one morning, and everybody appears to be comfortable--people are drinking their coffee, reading their newspapers and magazines, working on their laptops, talking on their cell phones. Everything is normal and peaceful. At each station, a few people get off, a few people get on, everything is calm and sedate, until the train stops at a particular station and a man walks onto your train car with his children. He finds seats for them and then sits down in a reflective mood. While he is in deep meditation, the children begin to run up and down the aisle, screaming and shouting, running all over the train car.

How do you feel? Are you mad at the man?why are you mad?you are perhaps thinking, this man should take care of his children in public. If he does not know how to take care of children, why did he have them in the first place! Are you mad at the children for making so much noise? Spoiled kids! You might think. You notice there is no mother. Now you might be thinking, i bet the mother left this man with these undisciplined children. See yourself going up to this irresponsible father and confronting him, saying "excuse me, sir, would you mind tending your children? They're being so disruptive, and i think everybody is getting a little upset." The man looks up at you and says, "Two hours ago these children lost their mother in the hospital. She just died, and ever since then i have trying to explain to them the death of their mother, and their only reaction is this."

Now how do you feel?

Situations in themselves do not produce feelings. It is our perception of them that makes us feel good or bad.